Top 5 Incidents with my Glasses at Gigs

OK. Something a little different this week. I hope this might act as a useful reminder to myself that a) I am stupid, b) Beer only serves to make me more stupid and c) I should NEVER wear my glasses down the front at a gig - it's only going to end one way. I guess anyone who knows me has a pretty good idea where this is heading. These are in chronological order.

5. Pendragon at The Marquee (Late 80's)
I was a big fan of prog rock at the time and a regular at The Marquee when it was based in Charing Cross Road. It was a popular venue for the new wave of prog bands that continued to eek out an existence in the shadow of the mini-revival boom that had been stoked by Marillion. For all their faults you could rely on a prog band for a good bit of pogo-ing down the front. It was in the midst of one of these nights that my specs came off. This was the first time it had happened and I remember shouting "No! My Glasses!" as they tumbled in slow motion through the air. Amazingly the people nearest to me heard and we were able to create a small pocket of space in the surrounding chaos. There on the floor, almost lit from above like some holy grail, were my specs. I scooped them up, stuck them in my pocket and we all carried on bouncing. Huzzah!

4. The Georgia Satellites at The Town & Country Club (Early 90's)
I was being careful. I'd learnt my lesson. I stayed further back and avoided the tempting crush down the front. Nodding my head to the music what could go wrong. Then the music got to me and my head nodding became more rigorous. One big flick and - ping! - glasses gone. I turned around to find where they'd fallen and saw the bloke behind me holding them in his hand. Gratefully retrieved my specs and shuffled off quietly to the bar.

3. The Phantoms at The Fighting Cocks, Kingston (12th May 2004)
Watching some mates play what may have been their first proper pub gig I was somehow goaded into making things a bit more lively. Following my last incident I'd purchased one of those spongy straps to keep my specs on at gigs and for a while they did the trick. They did make me look a bit spoddy though, so by the early 2000's I was wearing them less. This was just a pub gig anyway so I wasn't expecting to get involved. In the midst of a jumping frenzy I "sensibly" decided to tuck my glasses out of harms way by placing them just behind one of the front monitors. Perfect. All went well until the gig finished. I'm chatting with a mate and one of the guitarists comes over to say hello. As he stepped off stage there was a crack under his foot and my glasses were no more.

2. Detroit Cobras at ULU (8th September 2004)
Note the date. A mere four months after my previous incident. New specs in place. This was a cracking gig. I was well sozzled by the time the Cobras hit the stage and there was no way I could resist the lure of their blend of classic soul and garage rock. Mid-pogo my glasses did that familiar mid air somersault off my nose and disappeared into the dark below. Unlike the Pendragon gig I couldn't find them. They had completely vanished from view. Enjoying the rest of the gig I had a minor epiphany - realising that if I'm moshing about down the front I didn't actually need to be wearing my specs at all. When the bands had finished I had a root about to see if I could locate my specs and found just one single lens. It was heavily scratched and not much use but I took it home as a reminder that I needed to be more careful in future.

1. Dananananayroyd at Hoxton Bar & Grill (2nd April 2009)
This was a fun evening of beer and hijinks, missed last trains, an overnight stay in that there London and getting trapped in a corridor the following morning. Five years on and it looked like I'd got the message. I took a hard case to most gigs and stuck my specs away if I felt the urge to mosh. The specs I'd got after the Cobras gig were still going. They were a great pair of glasses, the coolest I'd ever owned, but were a little bent out of shape from the normal rigours of family life. That's no excuse though. I should have taken them off before the music took control. We'd had a fair bit to drink and not very much to eat. We'd come up straight from work and I'd forgotten to bring my case. The music started, the crowd went wild, I couldn't resist. Thirty seconds in and - spoing! Another pair of glasses hit the deck and disappear for ever. Another brilliant gig means I'm having too much fun to care. Again one of my mates went in search of my ruined glasses and amazingly found them amongst the dust and detritous at the front of the stage. They weren't in good shape.

This doesn't read too well for me does it. Over twenty five years attending gigs and I still haven't learnt my lesson. I'm over forty now, a father of two, I really should know better. Despite that, these were all great nights out. Maybe I just have to accept that this is inevitable. I also know that I should try contact lenses. I have had a couple of aborted attempts but it's the whole sticking your finger in your eye thing. Its just unnatural.

The shattered remains of my lovely OWP spectacles.

Top 5 Muppets

I can remember the first time I ever saw the Muppets. A boring evening at one of my Uncles was transformed by an explosion of colour and a show that seemed to be "The Good Old Days" for kids. I was clearly drawn to the under-dog characters. The great Gonzo being fired from a cannon and ignored by everyone, Fozzie's jokes failing miserably to raise a laugh and Beaker's realisation of impending doom from the inevitable explosion he was about to face. Maybe I feel some empathy with these characters but then I also found Waldorf and Statler's acerbic wit just as funny. Animal? He's just cool.

1. Gonzo

2. Waldorf and Statler

3. Animal

4. Beaker

5. Fozzie Bear

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Top 5 things written by Alan Moore

Continuing the comics theme. Alan Moore is a genius and I was lucky enough to be reading comics at a time when he was at his peak. He changed the face of comic book writing and spearheaded the British invasion of Marvel and DC. In the words of Pop Will Eat Itself - "Alan Moore knows the score".

1. Captain Britain (Marvel UK) Art: Alan Davis
In the early 80's Marvel UK, an imprint that had previously existed to reproduce Marvel US stories for the British weekly market, began producing original material. Alan Moore took over writing duties from Dave Thorpe and turned Captain Britain into the first truly great UK based title. Initially published in "Marvel Superheroes" Moore's stories were so popular Marvel created the new "Daredevils" title (which also featured the excellent noir-esque "Night Raven" text stories) to showcase his talents. Illustrated by Alan Davis, Captain Britain was an easy introduction to the world of Moore. On the face of it a standard comic-book superhero story but with the sort of sub-plots and hidden meaning that went deeper and darker than anything I read before.

2. V for Vendetta (Quality Comics) Art: David Lloyd
Dez Skinn was the man responsible for transforming Marvel UK and when he fell out with the Marvel hierarchy he began his own Quality Comics imprint. Warrior was the flagship title and in it's 26 issue lifespan it became home for the best and most original UK comic creations. Originally published in black and white with art by Dave Lloyd, V offered a dystopian view of Britain under the rule of a fascist party with echoes of Nazi Germany and Orwell's "1984". Warrior ceased publication before the story had finished and DC eventually republished and completed the story in colour for the US market.

3. Watchmen (DC Comics) Art: Dave Gibbons
Following his successful run on "Swamp Thing" Moore was given the chance to produce his own limited series. "Watchmen" was the moment when comics really broke into the mainstream. A story told from more than one viewpoint with a non-linear plot that redefined what comics could do. An alternative history of the United States where superheroes had existed since the 40's and were now considered part of the establishment.

4. The Ballad of Halo Jones (Fleetway) Art: Ian Gibson
My memories are kind of hazy now but I'm pretty sure my earliest contact with Moore was through 2000AD. "Future Shocks" and "Time Twisters" were one-off stories, a sort of sci-fi "Tales of the Unexpected". These were followed by "D.R. and Quinch" the time travelling miscreants who brought a touch of humour to "the Galaxy's greatest comic". Halo Jones was a more serious story chronicling the female lead's journey from teenage runaway to interstellar soldier. A radically different tale from anything else published in 2000AD, or anywhere else at the time.

5. Marvelman (Quality Comics) Art: Garry Leach/Alan Davis
Another "Warrior" story. Moore took a character, originally created by Mick Anglo in 1954, that had not been seen since the early 60's and transformed him into a contemporary hero. Initially unaware of his superhero past he struggles to overcome chronic migraines and dreams of his previous life. He eventually rediscovers his power and embarks on a search for the truth behind his loss of memory and the people responsible.

Crikey. That reads like a potted history of early 80's comics. Sorry, I'll try to be wittier and more concise next week.

Top 5 Movies based on comics

I'm getting needlessly excited about the release of the Watchmen movie. Most of the superhero films I saw as a kid were major disappointments. The technology wasn't capable of coping with the most basic of powers, the plot lines and acting were rarely good enough to compensate. Hollywood also concentrated most of it's early financial backing on DC characters and I was a Marvel fan. Nowadays, in an echo of the golden age of comics, Marvel characters are claiming the limelight.

1. Sin City (2005) dir: Frank Miller/Robert Rodriguez
A visually stunning movie that perfectly captures the tone and feel of Frank Miller's original comic. Tarantino and Rodriguez know how to film pulp fiction and the addition of creator Frank Miller as a director also paid dividends. I don't think it's possible to create a closer version of the original material as they achieved with Sin City.

2. Iron Man (2008) dir: Jon Favreau
It doesn't get bogged down in having to explain what the comic was all about yet manages to capture all the important elements of the story. Iron Man was never my favourite Marvel title and that might have let me enjoy the film without spotting all the irritating mistakes. Not that I think they made any. Robert Downey Jr is the perfect Tony Stark and the plot manages to explain his transformation into Iron Man without slowing the pace of the film. Favreau is already lined up to direct a sequel but what I'm really excited about is The Avengers movie which is expected to follow it.

3. Spider-man (2002) dir: Sam Raimi
I think this was the film that showed Hollywood it was possible to create a "comic book" movie that was a good film and not just a cash in. My memory had this out before X-men but it seems I'm wrong about that. Raimi gets everything right including the casting of Tobey Maguire as the awkward and fallible Peter Parker. Spider-man 2 maintains the quality and possibly benefits from not having to deal with the origin story but for me the original edges it.

4. X-men (2000) dir: Bryan Singer
It's not perfect but Singer gets more things right than he gets wrong. Possibly higher placed than it would be if I didn't love the original X-Men comics so much. Wolverine is a fantastic character but he's dominated the sequels to the detriment of the rest of the cast. This film gets the balance just about right and benefits from focusing on a smaller group of superheroes.

5. Batman Returns (1992) dir: Tim Burton
My favourite Batman film. Burton gave the studio what they wanted with "Batman" (1989) then got to make the film he wanted with this film. Keaton isn't perfect as Bruce Wayne but Danny DeVito's Penguin more than made up for that. I considered "The Dark Knight" in this spot but (and this might be a symptom of getting old) felt it a lacked some subtlety in it's story telling. Too many guns and explosions which didn't really evoke the feel of the original Frank Miller story.

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Top 5 Mr Men

Roger Hargreaves stumbled across the perfect formula for children's bed time reading. They're quick to read, easy to follow and colourful to look at. They're timeless too. I had them read to me as a kid and now read them to my children who enjoy them as much as I did. If I ever become a grandad I wouldn't be at all surprised to see the process happen again. A mention also for Arthur Lowe who narrated the TV series. His was the perfect voice for the style of story and the voice I hear in my head (and occasionally try to emulate) when reading the stories out loud.

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Top 5 Most Played Songs on my iPod

Something a bit different this week to celebrate the completion of a musical challenge I began back in August 2008. I've now listened to all 3512 songs on my iPod in alphabetical order of song title. It was like a massive shuffle with absolutely no repeats. I'm pleased that for the most part I enjoyed every song and there were only a few albums I felt the need to remove having finished. These then are the songs that I have played more than any other.

1. "Neighbourhood #3: Power Out" Arcade Fire (37)

2. "I Will Follow You Into The Dark" Death Cab For Cutie (25)

3. "Going Missing" Maximo Park (24)

4. "Hold Me In The River" Brakes (22)

5. "The Lowest Bitter" Les Savy Fav (21)

Which is all embarrassingly indie-centric. I guess these all come from albums I have really loved in the last couple of years. The Arcade Fire would have claimed a clean sweep, with tracks from "Funeral", had I not restricted each artist to one song. I'm looking forward to adding some new music to the Pod and having a free choice in what to play.

Top 5 Car Chases

Car chases can be a bit like drum solo's. They're easy enough to do but not so easy to get right and too often you're left feeling you've seen it all before. These are five car chases that either defined the style or took it on to new levels.

1. Bullitt (1968)
The film that made every boy in my generation want to own an American muscle car. Steve McQueen has a ball doing his own driving stunts as Bullitt (in a 1968 Ford Mustang 390 CID Fastback) chases two hit-men (in a 1968 Dodge Charger R/T 440 Magnum) through the streets of San Francisco. Lalo Schifrin provides the jazzy score that perfectly complements the action.

2. The French Connection (1971)
A breathtaking chase through Brooklyn as Gene Hackman attempts to keep pace with a subway train on an elevated section of track. Much of the impetus of the footage is due to legendary stunt driver Bill Hickman driving (a 1971 Pontiac Le Mans) at high speed through uncontrolled traffic and red lights. Director Friedkin had obtained no prior permission for the stunt and several accidental collisions occurred during the action that remained in the final film.

3. The Italian Job (1969)
A glorious celebration of British eccentricity as Micheal Cane executes the most ridiculous gold heist in the history of cinema. The three Mini Cooper Ss steal the show as they wend their way out of a gridlocked Turin, through the shopping arcades of Via Roma, up the roof of Torino Palavela, around the Fiat rooftop test track, and through a set of sewer pipes to escape the pursuing Italian police. The perfect advert for the Cooper S and a major contribution to making the Mini a cultural icon.

4. The Blues Brothers (1980)
The Blues Brothers was once, and may well still be, the film in which more cars were destroyed during production than any other. Car chases make up a great deal of the film, as Jake and Elwood wend their way across country, occasionally interrupted by bursts of classic Stax Soul, in an attempt to complete their "mission from God". The indoor car chase through a shopping mall and the climatic ending off an incomplete elevated highway stand out in my mind but really this is just a vote for the prolonged destruction of cars throughout.

5. Death Proof (2008)
Not one of Tarantino's best but Quentin does manage to create the greatest cinematic car chase for over twenty years. The final chase, in which Stuntman Mike first terrifies and is then terrified by three cute chicks in a 1970 Dodge Challenger, is a truly edge of the seat sequence. The "Ship's Mast" stunt suggests that Zoë Bell has balls of steel hidden beneath her feminine charms. Spectacular stuff.

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Top 5 Songs of 2008

Completing my round up of all that was fab in 2008 here's my favourite songs of the year. Always a bit tricky to pin down as the songs that stick in my mind aren't necessarily ones that end up on the albums that I buy but I like having the opportunity to talk about songs I probably wouldn't do otherwise.

1. Jim Jones Revue "Rock n Roll Psychosis" - The JJR really rocked my world in 2008. As I've probably already said, they're loud and raucous and impossible to ignore. This was the lead single of the album and as good a start point as any for someone wanting to know what they sound like.

2. Adele "Hometown Glory" - I'm not sure what history will say about Adele, but there's no doubt she can sing. There's a mass of female singers with major label backing around at the moment and it can be hard to pick out the genuinely decent artists from the ones with a half decent voice and expensive production. "Hometown Glory" is the song that made me think Adele is the genuine article.

3. The Ting Tings "That's Not My Name" - This is a bit trashy and almost certainly the only thing of value The Ting Tings will ever release. It's damn catchy though and almost impossible not to sing along with in the car (or on the bus for that matter!).

4. Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds "Dig, Lazarus, Dig!!!" - Mr Cave took his Grinderman influence back to the Bad Seeds for the album of the same name and this track stood out as the best of the set.

5. Vampire Weekend "A-Punk" - Quite a lot of Indie rock bands to waste my time on. MGMT, Okkervil River and Death Cab for Cutie all competed for my attention. Deep down I know this is exactly the sort of music I'll love for 2 months and hate in a year but I can't help myself. I blame my parent's record collection and my formative years being shaped by a combination of The Beatles, The Carpenters, Abba and The New Seekers. I've come to accept a predilection to enjoying bright and breezy poppy rock bands ... however briefly it lasts.

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Top 5 Gigs of 2008

Managed fourteen gigs last year, all good nights. Near misses included The Godfathers & The Jim Jones Revue at Islington Academy, Youthmovies at Kingston Fighting Cocks, The (legendary) Sonics at The Forum and the Black Lips at the 100 Club.

1. The Dirtbombs (University of London Union) - OK, so I was a fairly sozzled by the time they reached the stage. An afternoon in the pub followed by a few at the venue had me in a very good mood and ensured I spent most of the time pogoing like a maniac. The Dirtbombs would make my top five current live acts and I'd recommend seeing them at every opportunity.

2. A Silver Mt. Zion (Scala) - Post rock live isn't always the most enthralling of prospects but ASMZ continue to amaze me with every tour. This was the best show I've seen them do and the last few have all been excellent as well.

3. British Sea Power (Koko) - A packed out Koko and BSP at the height of their powers, built to a magnificent conclusion with the guitarist Noble climbing the walls.

4. Les Savy Fav (Astoria) - First time I'd seen them live and they lived up to their reputation. It's all about front man Tim Harrington who really steals the show spending as much time in the audience as he does on stage. An icon for fat bald blokes everywhere.

5. Johnny Foreigner/Dananananaykroyd/William (Madame Jo Jo's) - A triple bill of new Indie bands which provided another, slightly alcohol fuelled, great night out. William and Jo Fo were decent enough but it was Dananananaykroyd who stole the show. Another sweaty night for me including being right in the middle of the "wall of cuddles". Top time.

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Top 5 Books I read in 2008

I hadn't particularly realised until now but I clearly spent quite a bit of 2008 reading classic literature. Catching up with books I felt I should have read for some time. I did manage a fair bit of contemporary fiction which I also enjoyed, just not quite as much as the older stuff.

1. George Orwell "Down and Out in Paris and London" - Orwell is fast becoming my favourite author. Picked this up second hand from someone at work along with a couple of others. Read this first on his recommendation and was stunned. A fascinating account of Orwell's time spent living on the poverty line, working as a kitchen hand in Paris and mixing with the down and outs in London. A wonderfully written account that is a much better read than I am able to properly describe.

2. Robert Louis Stevenson "The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde" - A very familiar story of course, but reading the original text shows just why it has remained so popular and why so many television and film creators choose to revisit the premise. I'm in the middle of "Treasure Island" now and wouldn't be surprised to see that make my list for next year.

3. Woody Guthrie "Bound For Glory" - Brilliant autobiography of the American folk singer that reads more like a work of fiction. Guthrie brilliantly describes his upbringing as a child in detail that I can only marvel at and tells the story of America during the dust bowl years in a vivid and heart felt manner.

4. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle "The Sign of Four" - The second of the Sherlock Holmes stories which I'm working through in chronological order. Possibly not quite as gripping as the first but a fine piece of detective fiction none the less.

5. David Mitchell "Cloud Atlas" - Just to bring the list a little more up-to-date this was nominated for the Man Booker prize in 2004. Interesting concept that consists of six stories, each written in a different style, nested within each other like a Russian doll. There could be an element of style over substance, I certainly struggled to get into it initially, but in the end I think it's a novel with a well crafted story that does something a bit different.